Keeping life milestones offline changed how I share important moments. Friends had long modeled that approach for me, calling to announce engagements, pregnancies, or, at times, to confide difficult news like a divorce, a job loss, or a serious diagnosis. When those same friends later posted on social media, I felt grateful they had reached out first. Being told directly, rather than finding out in a public post, made me feel included in their lives.
When it was my turn, I prioritized personal connections
In 2023, a lot happened at once. Early in the year, my boyfriend and I bought a small weekend place in the mountains. That spring, he proposed there under a clear, starry sky. We were both in our mid-30s and ready to start a family. In the summer, we eloped in a quiet ceremony at the spot where we had our first date three years earlier. By fall, we were sharing that we were expecting our first child.
I felt the pull to post photos of each moment. Instead, I sent messages inviting friends to meet up or talk by phone. I skipped the classic keys-in-front-of-the-house snapshot and told people over drinks that we had bought a vacation home. Friends cheered and clinked glasses. When I hugged a friend I had not seen in a while, she noticed the ring as it caught the light. Another friend stopped by with a housewarming gift and saw the blurry sonogram on the fridge, then teared up and said how happy she was for us.
Hugs beat out likes or heart emojis any day
So much unfolded so quickly that my answer to “what’s new?” sometimes became a cascade: we bought a house, got engaged, got married, and we are having a baby. Each time I shared in person, I relived the happiness through someone else’s reaction. Those conversations created memories a post could not match. Waiting to tell people face-to-face or by phone brought a rush nothing on a screen could replace.
Technology still helps me keep in touch across distances. But for the highs and lows, sharing privately, in person when possible or by call when not, has proven the best way for me to stay truly connected.